Tuesday, April 29, 2014

"Creative English": A "normal" English speakers guide to poetic thought Part 1

I believe "Creative English" should be considered as a completely another language. I don't know about you, but for those of us who speak this kind of English....we tend to leave "normal" English speaking society quite confused as we talk with colorful metaphors, poeticness, similes, alliteration, parallelism, and so on. I would like to take my dear time to "define", "interpret" and "translate" several of my own phrases.....

"Artistically Inspiring" (wither that be a young European man, a building, a painting, a piece of jewelry, a stained glass window, or some unusual abstractness)

"He reminds me of a an orange flavored strawberry:"
1.He is a musical narcissist at heart.
2. He is peculiar, but has admirable qualities, and such beautiful sea glass eyes.

"Everything I say is a sarcastic lie": (Figure out this riddle...it's easy...=P)

"Walking the streets of this beautiful life"- as life is lived many wonderful people were met and great experiences happened that forever hugged and kissed one's soul.

"Colorful alibis and scandalous smiles"- a genre of young European man..be careful with such as him.

"Oh how he loves potatoes"- He's full of himself. Arrogance is his morning cup of tea.

"Oh how the Russian tables have turned"- expected turn of events, good for the protagonist, unfortunate for their enemy.

"The scars remain"- not physical, but rather emotionally, internally, soulfully, heartily.

"It was as if heaven descended upon earth" a life situation was so beautiful it felt like Divinity had overshadowed it.

"It's like I died and could never be resurrected again"
- experienced such an embarrassing moment you never want to show your face in public ever again....OR you were so happy it was like just BEYOND frikin happy.

"I was left so speechless"- A life situation which you were so shocked (usually a good thing) your over social personality literally has no words to speak.

"One bite never hurt anyone" - in reference realization to Eve, when she took a bite of that tempting red juicy apple, all of humanity was destructed and sin entered the world.

Don't laugh too hard....=P To be continued...Part 2

Sunday, April 27, 2014

Perspective: Eastern Europe vs. America

I'd like to take a moment to offer some perspective on various things I've learned and experienced this past year, and several realizations and realities of life that have been revealed to me. Having the blessing and curse of growing up with two cultural lenses, I would like to express my criticism and upliftedness towards these cultures. Since I have experienced both these cultures, I believe I have every right to simply say how it is....wither it is offensive or not. If you don't like needles, the following reflection might sting you a little bit....

Musical Perspective: One thing I've noticed about Eastern Europe is it's perfectionism. I used to be like that as well, up until I was 15, and then I decided not to be perfect. That was the best decision of my life. I am much more free as a person. I've heard this phrase on the streets of Lietuva..."If you're not perfect at it...don't do it".....basically for things such as music, art, etc.....When I was living in America I was taught the perspective everything is possible. You can become anything that you want to be when you grow up. So I believed it with my whole heart. and now, as a young adult, looking back I wouldn't say I necessarily believe it with all of my heart...then on the other hand, in Eastern Europe I've noticed the perspective that is taught "Be realistic....You CAN'T become anything you want to be....most things ARE NOT possible....so now I find myself stuck somewhere in the middle...I don't completely agree with either perspective...I notice in Eastern Europe this perspective has infected my generation like a incurable disease...Many passions, visions, and dreams, have died because of this. My heart and soul cries and breaks over this thought.

So when it comes to music, Lietuva expects perfection. I'm sorry my dearest country, but it's time to wake up to the 21st century. Not everyone is born pure Mozarts.and you know what? that's okay. I completely disagree with the perspective that someone has to be perfect musically to be considered a "musician" in Eastern Europe. That is an old trend that is outdated and long gone in opinion. Especially within the Christian music scene in Europe, which seems like it was born yesterday.......cause in reality it was, I identify with many people within this circle. We are simply people who love Jesus with all our hearts, souls, and minds who have a passion to serve through doing music ministry. We may not necessarily all be perfect Mozarts, and I think that is just fine. The world needs more musicians who not just do music...but LOVE Jesus AND LOVE Music at the same time. And in this part of the world, when someone is rejected because they are not a musical perfectionist...I'm sorry that's just wrong...If God places a musical passion to glorify Himself in someone's heart, who are you to reject that person? You must have no soul to commit such an act....honestly speaking.......

Cultural Perspective: Out of all the places I've EVER lived in my life, I have never been SO offended and SO  blessed at the same time....How can these two concepts happen at the same time?....I don't know...I've often wondered that myself...It's like when I woke up in the morning these past almost 9 months, I knew in the back of my mind, I was going to be offended at least 20 times, and blessed 20 times as well all on the same day....and you guessed right this ALL goes back to my blessing and cursing in life.....being born into a two cultured situation. God, seriously....this part of the world..,...Eastern Europe...I forgot how STRONG cultural identity is....my dear God of heaven.....it's SO SICKENLY STRONG.....What really bothers me is how judgmental people are...I'm sorry, but if you're going to judge someone based on their cultural background...you might as well just go to hell in my book.....If you don't take the time to get to know my life, my story, the heavens, hells, depressions, sadnesses and joys of  what it took to for me to be here and sacrifice my old life so I could live in this country..I really have no respect for you. Not at all.

We're not nationalities, we're all children of God at the end of the day. When we die, God isn't going to look at our passports, or some document, and judge us according to that. Just saying. Your cultural identity DOES NOT DEFINE WHO YOU ARE IN GOD'S EYES...remember this...it's quite important....

Another thing I simply can't stand about humanity are the "culture haters".....I "hate" to break it to you...but YOUR culture IS NOT the "best" one. God loves ALL people and ALL cultures the same. In as sense I used to be a little like that. I would choose which culture group of people I would like, and which one I would not associate myself with....sounds horrible doesn't it? I know it truly is. Since from the day I was born, I have had to balance two cultures, and God has blessed me with opportunities to walk life with MANY cultures, I can honestly say those experiences of crucially shaped me to who I am today. At the end of my life when I look back, I desire to confidently say with no regrets, "Jesus, I chose to LOVE EVERY PERSON FROM EVERY CULTURE that you blessed me to meet in this beautiful life, for YOUR GLORY".....

One of the hardest things as a Christian that you will EVER have to do...especially for those of us who are involved with cross-cultural missions, is LOVING those cultures who don't necessarily LOVE you back......

I strike myself as that person who ALWAYS have to offer that extra mercy and grace to someone. I have to culturally blend my personality in a way to fit that cultural context or situation. I don't necessarily mean that I change the heart and soul of who I am, but basically when I first meet someone and get to know them, I do a quick analysis of how I can adapt to and best relate to the person in way that is relevant to who they are...This is truly a "social art' that God has been teaching me the past several years of my life, especially this year....If I were to be in those same social situations 5 years ago,...I probably wouldn't have met at least 90% of the friends that I know now. I would have been way too shy and under confident. Overall, I'm a VERY UNDERSTANDING person. I have honestly lived through many life situations, and I really do understand where humanity is coming from. I like to make sure I am as genuine, transparent, honest, and original to everyone I meet. I'm the type of person, if you're drinking coffee and it comes out of your nose and splashes all over your leather jacket, I won't judge you. I won't make fun of you. =) cause I've done that many times myself. Like yeah, so I may look like a high maintenance over fashionable Lietuve, with bright red lipstick, wild personality....but that's just the external of how I express myself, internally my heart of hearts is to simply relate to humanity, and be a reflection of Christ. =)

Tuesday, April 22, 2014

A Response to the "Mockers"

You laugh at me now...but 10 years from "now" you will have your mouth completely shut.

YOU laugh at me NOW...but 10 YEARS from NOW YOU will have YOUR mouth completely SHUT.

YOU LAUGH AT ME NOW...but 10 years from now......YOU WILL HAVE your mouth completely SHUT.


I have made a commitment to relentless and passionately pursue Jesus, until my last dying breath......
If you throw rocks in my eyes, I will still keep going......
If you punch me in the face, nevertheless I will continue on my journey.....
If you push me down, I will get back up like nothing ever happened.....

So who are YOU to LAUGH?
Who are YOU to MOCK?

I pray one day that the snake scales would fall off your blinded and misled eyes....

I know the God whom I serve, who I pray to, I see the beginning of it all and I see the end, and this end concludes in VICTORY.

Pure VICTORY in the loving arms of God....<3

Stand Defiant by For Today: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TCqbjp-sKWM

Sunday, April 20, 2014

Taking the Church Outside the Walls

This morning, as I was seeking God's heart, He inspired me with the following, and as always, I just thought I would share with you my dearest friend...

As I was praying,
I was reminded of one of the music festival's vison's statement from childhood, the vision statement expresses “Taking the Church outside the walls, bringing Light into the darkness with the life-changing message of the Gospel of Jesus Christ.” (Alan Greene, Lifelight Music Festival)
And I was thinking, you know? This whole message of Jesus Christ rising again on Easter morning, it's so beautiful....it TRULY is......but honestly, what good is this Easter message if you don't even bother to take it OUTSIDE the church walls...I've lost count of how many easter services I've gone to my entire life...and of course it's always the same "usual" message.......I live in a country where people are DYING to know the truth....I walk by them every day on the streets, every single day....and what do I do? I simply walk by them, as their heart, soul, and mind continues to become more broken, more lost as they fill their lives with empty and worthless things that will truly never satisfy them. Honestly, what good is the Easter message, if I just go to church, digest the same message, and don't bother to proclaim this hope to the world? I was shocked where my thoughts of criticality were coming from, but honestly, it's so true in my life, as I sure it is the same in yours.

Growing up when I was younger, I was afraid to share my faith with others. Especially verbally proclaiming it. I believe that Jesus has blessed us all with uniquely individual, beautiful and original styles for His glory. I know for me, even to this day, I express my faith in Jesus Christ best through music, art and sharing my story with other people. As much as I endlessly LOVE talking with humanity, when I sing of God's love to people, my entire heart and soul, is just poured out in such a way, that differs from when I simply talk to someone.  From personal evangelistic experience, I believe that there are TWO types of evangelistic styles: Longterm and Shorterm. By long term, for example, this is my style. I meet someone on the streets of life, at a university, you name the place, and firstly I establish a friendship with them..I don't necessarily tell them that I am a Christian, I just let them figure it out slowly as I live my life. After I have established are really close and geuniue friendship relationship with them, and we know that we can both trust each other with are thought perspectives on life, THAT'S when I directly start telling them about Jesus...wither this period takes several days, months, years, decades, honestly depends on the person. and honestly for me, this has been the most effective style to lead people to Jesus in my life.

On the other hand, the short term evangelistic style, is basically where you meet a person (this is the style I believe we traditionally think of when we think of the word "evangelism") and you straight up tell them about Jesus on the spot, even though you just met them about 10 seconds ago. Personally, I don't like this style, and I think it is too "in your face" but I have met quite alot of people in my life where God has given them the gift of short term evangelistic style and long term as well. I myself have found myself in endless short term situations, and I have realized that this style is definetly not my God given gift. I am DEF more of a long term evangelizer. I believe each style of evangelism has it's time and place depending on the context of the situation, and which culture you happen to find yourself in. I HIGHLY encourage you to go and find what your evangelistic style is.....

Living in Lithuania, has taught me an endless amount of life perspective. Let's be really honest for a few moments. We are truly a "RESERVED" people group. That's just simply who we are, and we have to learn to deal with it. Not all of us, but the majority of us, and there is simply NOTHING wrong with that. When it comes to evangelism, it can be hard for us because simply walking up to someone we've never met on the street is seemingly CULTURALLY IRRELEVANT. In some aspects it's considered a "social taboo". I would like to share this following analogy with you..."

"Every culture of the world is like a soup, some are blessed to be the carrots, onions, broth, tomatoes, others are the potatoes, or the dill, or the basil...we are not necessarily "the perfect soup" we simply have to make the most of who we are for God's glory..."

Even though culturally we are so different, I believe that God uses EACH culture and EACH people group that He has EVER created to be a unique and original expression of His Love.....

At the end of the day, we may all believe in the same Jesus, but how we go about evangelizing to the world about the Gospel message, will GREATLY differ depending on cultural context.

As from personal experience, it's a one of kind life experience that most people I would say aren't blessed or shall I say cursed to go through....you know that feeling of  waking up in the morning and realizing I'm nothing  like my OWN flesh in blood.....3 million people.....It's funny how you can be genetically related to someone and be nothing like them at all.....bluntly speaking....

I will question everyday until I die, why I was chosen to live such a perspective, I guess I can cry about it, try to smile about the peculiar originality of it, or do a mix of both and somehow trust God, that nevertheless, He will use this interpretation of life for His most wonderful glory.........

I pray dearest friend, that God would give you the strength to find boldness, and relentless courage in your heart to share this Easter message with those around you....... who may not necessarily be found within the church walls....

Sunday, April 13, 2014

It Was Worth It Part 2

I look back on how life has been radically shaken these 8 past months,
I find myself standing admist the Baltic Sea,
I've had my share of disappointments, fears, failures, hells, and heavens,
.........but I realize in my heart....................I wouldn't change a single thing............
Every judgement, every mocking laugh, everyone who turned away,
as I stare into the vibrant orange gleaming sunset,
I fall to my knees and cry out to my dearest Jėzus,
YOU ARE SO WORTH IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
the sacrifice to be here on precious Lietuva soil I realized was TOO GREAT,
but as the tears stream from my face,
as I look into the heavens.........
How much greater was your sacrifice on the cross Jėzus?................
For my OWN flesh and blood to know you Jėzus,

Every beautiful soul that you created heavenly Father, was SO WORTH meeting, over the past 8 months, past summer, past year, and all the former years of my life thus far,

Each beautiful, unique, and original walking story.......
Those glimmering Baltic eyes............NEVER will I FORGET.........how WORTH IT....how TRULY WORTH IT....it is..........

My prayer over dearest Lietuva: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MgxpMofUYIE

Wednesday, April 9, 2014

It's the BLIND leading the BLIND Pt.1

“It’s the blind leading the blind leading the blind to their demise….” (For Today) if there is one phrase that could summarize my life after being back in Lithuania for almost a year that would be it. I would like to take the time to HONESTLY reflect what I have experienced and how God has worked in my life and what He has revealed to me. I also want to say straight forward, what I am about to write WILL NOT be politically correct. If you have a problem with language and open mindness, this reflection is not for you. 

This whole concept of being “BLIND”. I thought I would be immune to spiritual and cultural blindness but I am not as I realized this past year living in Lithuania. First I would like to address the issue of music ministry.  In my opinion, there are two types of musicians in the world:  the stuck up snot assholes, or the humble ones. That’s it.  Unfortunately, for the past 12 years of my life, I have met one too many musical assholes, to put it bluntly…. One of MY GREATEST PET PEEVES is when a supposed “Christian” musician sings about “God” on stage, seems all warm and welcoming but once they set foot off stage, they’re such a SHITTY person to the people who look up to them. They are arrogant and prideful.  We as Christians have created SUCH AN EMBARASSING music ministry scene for ourselves. It’s absolutely disgusting. Five years ago, I would not have had the courage to say these words straight forward, but since I’ve been surrounded by music ministry ever since I was 8 years old, I think the time has come to play the “Devil’s Advocate” within the music scene who claims to be Christian.  

I wouldn’t say every musician is like this. I have met very few musicians who claim to be Christian that I believe actually live up to the true standard of how it’s supposed to be.  I mean, let’s be REALLY HONEST, I challenge you, how are you living your life for Christ? Are you setting a true Christian example within the music, art, and daily life scene? Can people tell you passionately love God?  I think we as Christians within the music ministry scene and daily lives REALLY NEED TO CLEAN UP OUR ACT. I say these exact words over myself as well, I’m not just preaching to the choir or so to speak.  I remember growing up, I looked up to A LOT of Christian musicians and aspired to be just like them one day. Now imagine this, one day you turn 17 years old, and your realize one of your greatest musical inspirations was a TOTAL LIE. Do we even realize how our actions influence those around us? Or are we merely blind?!

Another thing I’ve noticed…the stark contrasting differences between the Christian music scene in America verse Europe. I could say at one point, America was doing a good job and repping the scene, nowdays, it’s a total embarrassment, not every band, but most of them. That’s one of the reasons I decided to move back to my home country of Lietuva. I was sick of the Christian music scene in that country. I really like Europe when it comes to music ministry because or most people in this part of the world, music from a Christian perspective is NEW. Worship leading is NEW. I prefer to be in places of the world where new never before music ministry movements are starting. After observing Europe’s interpretation of music from a Christian perspective, I can tell they are obviously quite new to it. They have a very LONG way to go compared to America, it’s not hopeless, and that is why I am here…to somehow help offer my loving perspective. I say this in the most kindest way. From the bottom of my heart, I REALLY DO BELIEVE in the potential of music ministry in Europe, but it is going to take a lot of spiritual discipline, and changing of old and traditional cultural mindset in order for Europe’s new Christian music scene to experience its greatest awakening.

Going back to the concept of blindness, I question to myself, have my own actions throughout my life led people astray? Or have I led the people in my life closer to God? I’m SO CONVICTED  by that. This past Sunday in church, one phrase that really spoke to my heart  was “The second we decide to JUDGE someone we officially close the door to LEARN anything more about them”…”Following God is a LEARNING PROCESS.” This phrase is SO TRUE. How many times have we judged someone and forever slammed the door in their face? I know I have one too many times.  How many times have people done that to me? One too many as well.  If we as Christians strive to live up to God’s fullest potential, we MUST be WILLING TO LEARN ABOUT OTHERS, just like we relentlessly learn about God, so we must do that to others. 

  Our spiritual and cultural blindness IS truly blind. And we are blindly leading others as well wither we like that reality or not. When I choose to judge someone or make a false accusation or assumption about them wither it be culturally or spiritually that’s when the BLINDNESS starts to infect and disease our very hearts, souls, bodies, and minds. We live in a culture that is INFECTED and DISEASED with BLINDNESS. I mean, every day, let’s be honest, how many of us make daily judgments and assumptions about others that we do not know for certain are true? To put it simply my own blindness will be the death of me, and his or her own blindness will be the death of them. We MUST make every effort to live in the light of God’s truth and OVERCOME this BLINDNESS.

To be continued. 

Inspired by the following song by For Today: Break the Cycle

Friday, April 4, 2014

This is IMPOSSIBLE! I CAN'T do this!

If there's two words that don't exist in my vocabulary its the words "IMPOSSIBLE" & "CAN'T".
I simply choose NOT to believe in such words.
I would like to write a response to those people who do believe in such words and say these words to others that make them feel discouraged and want to give up on their visions and dreams.
I don't know what bitterness scarred your soul as a child,
but seriously what kind of person are YOU to be SO rude and insensitive to your very own flesh and blood?
Do you realize how deep your words scar our hearts and souls?
Do you take pleasure and delight in bringing others down, and crushing their spirits?
Do you have a sick joy in your heart realizing that your discouragement is ruining God given passion, visions, and dreams? Does that just make you smile?
What kind of person are you to be SO HEARTLESS?!?!?!?!

If you want living proof that God still does miracles of the impossible today,
talk to me.
I have seen God come through in ways that are NOT humanly possible.
I have seen healings that SHOULDN'T"T be physically possible.
I have seen God unite humanity in communities that shouldn't have the possibility to exist.
God has put  beautiful and inspiring people in my path of life, that was completely His Divine coincidence, and not my own doing that radically impacted and changed me to who I am today.

I have been in that place where I heard the insults of those around me.
Saying that I "can't" do this,
or this passion, vision, or dream is truly "impossible"
or the sickening shit of "you'll never learn that language"
and yeah let's be honest, those mocking insults that come from such narrow minded people hurt like hell.
They don't realize the own poisonous venom of their deathly lifeless words.


What kind of IDIOT  does one have to be to be so negative and depressing towards someone?

If I am living proof that Jesus has come through so powerfully in my life, who is someone to say to me the words "can't" or "impossible"?

Mere jealously?.....................................................................................................................................

Because God has literally come through EVERY situation in my life that I thought would be impossible.
and He continues to do so EVERY DAY. and HE WILL NOT STOP.
Cause guess what?

All your insults, slaps on my face, every poisonous word, I will shield with the words of the true living Son of God, and rise above the impossibilities and "can't's of this life".

I'm that type of personality, if someone says I can't do something or that my vision or dream is impossible, I like to personally "slap them back in the face" (Metaphorically speaking of course!) and PROVE THEM WRONG. I like to then shut their mouths by showing them it IS TRULY POSSIBLE WITH GOD, and then leaving them speechless with nothing left to say. If it has to be done to such extreme measures such as this, I will do it with no regrets. 

Since I myself have experienced those feelings of discouragement and worthlessness, I choose NOT to be like those people who crush others dreams, hearts and souls. I choose to be that light for Jesus that ENCOURAGES, INSPIRES,  & AWAKENS, others hearts back to life, so we can all together pursue God's vision for our lives.

~Aistė Miškinytė

Fire In Your Eyes

I'll never forget that day,
That realization of life that unfolded before my very eyes.
He said to me, The day you lose the fire in your eyes and the soul in your smile, is the day your life officially ends".....
I remember I smiled, almost laughed, and I let his words lightly sink in.
As I got older, I realized how true his words were.
As I looked around me, I saw all these people....going somewhere......
and his words continue to resonate in the back of my mind,
I saw people who had lost that fire in their eyes,
and my heart felt so broken for them,
I promised that it would never happen to me,
and as I continued to get older,
the fight against flesh and the spirit grew stronger,
in a self destructing world,
I can honestly say there were very dark times in my life where the fire in my eyes was lost,
the fire was challenged,
put through burning trials that tested the very heart and soul of who I was,
but something deep in my soul knew that I had to keep this fire alive,
even if it was only a tiny spark that could be diminished with a single tear drop on my face,
even if it meant I would have to stand all alone through too many dark hours,
I knew that if I let this fire die once and for all,
all hope would be lost,
and HOPE must NEVER  be lost in the loving arms of God,
as I saw this broken world around me,
I knew I simply couldn't stay silent,
this fire that God gave me,
must passionately burn for this beautiful world to see.....