Tuesday, January 17, 2012

The Box

The following excerpt was inspired by this one beautiful person I once met who dared to be her complete self and change the world through the radical vision God gave her...

I can't do this! I can't do this!! she screams out in terror
He tells her, "my dear child, I believe in you,"
you CAN do this,
She says "I'd rather be put in a box,
put my life in a mere box, and be locked away forever",
He tells her, "your life is worth so much more than you think, don't choose the box"
She says, "I'm tired of this SO tired of being different,
the task you have have laid before my very eyes is too overwhelming,
I can't do this! You have the wrong person! Why me!? Why me?! she cries out in agony...
I'd rather be a camellion  that drowns in the endless color of this world,
This torment of people silently judging me for being me!
I can't go on like this"...tears slowly cascade from her sweet face,
He tells her, "my child why do you care what other people think? It doesn't matter, and never will matter, You are absolutely beautiful and I love you for who you truly are"...
She falls silent..."why then does every day, every day of my life seem like such a battle, such an endless fight as if someone tied a stone around my neck and my head tries to stay above the vast ocean water, but fails to do so?
Why do You "curse" me with such a passion that has so many unanswered questions, so much unpredictability, so many unknowns?!"
He tells her, "trust me dear child, I know what I am doing, in My timing I will make all those things right that you ever so doubt"...
She writes with a piece of blue chalk,
"You lift me up when I am weak,
Your arms wrap around me,.....
So I'm letting go" (The Afters)
She leans against the wall chalkboard as tears stream down the blackness,
her hands slide down the words she writes,
leaving an abstractness of smeared hand prints,
She looks up towards the starry night sky,
as tears like waterfalls flood her beautiful face, soul and heart,
She says,
"Father God....I never thought I'd be able to say this but,
"I'm letting go".....

Lift Me Up by The Afters: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KBy2D8p5Kpw

Tuesday, January 3, 2012

Ring By Spring

Well, it's finally the year 2012....How exciting! =D  I was contemplating in my head...hmmmmm...what would be an interesting post to start off 2012 with?
As I begin my spring semester of my freshman year at North Central in just a few days, I thought of what some  young college women may have on their minds...Ring. By. Spring. LOL Seriously, I sat there for hours on end, nervously biting my  nails, wondering why in the world after going to a cute little downtown Christian university for a semester that there wasn't a huge sparkling diamond on my Lithuanian ring finger....JUST KIDDING....I'm thinking more like pulling a Chris Tomlin....get married at  age 38 while having the entire worship arts world fooled into thinking that he's a family guy already...LOL  I pray by God's holy grace, dear friend, that you realize; there is more to life than rings by springs.

Day by day,  I have to wake up to the reality that I'm ACTUALLY a college student. It still doesn't feel like it to be honest. With this new season in front of my eyes, comes a whole new world of life. This is the time my generation starts to date. and oh indeed they do... It seems as if there is  pressure to date in some aspects. Left and right I see fellow friends getting engaged at 18, 19, 20 21...etc. IT"S CRAZY how everyone seems to grow up so fast. Don't get me wrong, there is nothing wrong with marrying young, it all depends on what your personal views obviously are. That leaves us single people kind of just standing there, reconsidering if we in fact should start dating as well and find our prince charming or princess.

I think there is something truly beautiful about "the art of being independent". Our society seems to become so obsessed with "finding the right one" we forget to embrace those years  of life where in fact we are single.  I recently came across the book "I Gave Dating A Chance" by Jeramy Clark. I came across this passage, that really intrigued me... "The fourth type of girl finds her identity in Christ and knows that she's worth more than anything a guy could offer. She recognizes that her friendships with both girls and guys are strongest when she loves others as Christ loves her, without expectation. She develops deep relationships because she doesn't need attention from others;she's secure in the love and attention she receives from the Lord. She wants companionship from others, not adoration. She doesn't need dates, though she welcomes them if they come. She knows that whether she dates or not, she is worthy and complete."
WOW. I was left speechless. Dearest sister, I pray that you will take these words to your precious heart. NEVER CHANGE YOURSELF FOR A GUY. It's not worth it. Be your complete self. I cannot stress that enough. BE YOUR COMPLETE SELF. If a guy doesn't like you for who you are, your insane smiley craziness and all...He is not worth your time. Sometimes I feel like I need to gain a little life perspective and go outside one rainy spring morning and just splash around in the mud puddles. Then, after that go up to   one of my guy friends, and see if he still views me the same way, beautifully covered in mud splatters...LOL The beauty of us single women, is that God has called us to live our lives to the fullest and most aliveness still whether or not we have a guy by our side. Instead of us, desperately searching for the right young man, as we live in our created element, passionately being who God created us to be, in the right timing God will bless us with that man of our dreams. So I pray that wherever life may find you this 2012 year and upcoming spring; single or dating, that you would remember to  passionately embrace all that God has created you to be and have the courage to always BE YOURSELF regardless of what people may think of the truly crazy, beautiful & unique you...