Death In His Eyes

I'll never forget the day I saw the death in your eyes,
I never realized eyes could have such a look,
until I saw yours,
 It was like seeing memories that could have been but never will be,
and in that moment my heart was pierced with a million knives,
that's how it felt,
to see death in your eyes,
You may never realize this but, that moment will be lost in my soul forever,
When  I wake up on Lithuanian soil,
When I fall asleep underneath your Russian sky,
The day I dedicate the song I wrote about you, to you,
Every single music ministry moment that lies ahead,
before I open my heart to sing of God's love in Lithuanian, Russian, any Slavic language,

I'll be thinking of you...

It still wakes me up in the middle of the night, like a mother who has lost her child,
just wondering what you're doing this very second,
what thoughts go through your mind?
Have you forgotten your first love?
Have you disowned every memory of you and I?
Have you forsaken your own heart?

Every dear soul I ever will be blessed to meet in this beautiful life,
when I look into their eyes,
I can't help but see your eyes,
Oh the death in your eyes,
I just want to cry forever, beyond eternity,

I wish I could change things,
but in this season of life,
 God has called us to be thousands of miles apart from each other,
or so I thought...

I honestly don't know anymore,
Honesty has lost its place,
Our lies and our truth blend together like a colorful mural of the mountainous Albanian sunset,
open to an unknown interpretation,
as I stand on the edge of that cliff,
looking into a sea of patchy golden sun, and murky black water searching for answers I will never know.......